Not a lot of time this week, so I’m posting a day early. It was not my intention to write something so rambling and only loosely relating to Paganism, but I really wanted to get back on the PBP Wagon. Hopefully next week will leave me time for a post requiring research.
I’m more than happy to tell you I think ADHD is over-diagnosed, but with the case of me and my spiritual studies, I won’t hesitate to adopt the term. When confronted with a new idea, book, deity, or random fact, I instantly jump from one area of study to another. I can’t finish out one thought process before I get excited by some new, only remotely related topic that leads me to another even less relevant idea, and so on.
In some ways, this is a positive thing. It happens because I love to learn, because I want to know everything there is to know, because I am a student for life and happily so. But there can be no good without the bad, and my study-jumping attitude means I am often left with half-learned information and far too much to think about.
In the Bardic Youth Course, one section spent a lot of time focusing on Balance, the meeting point of Positive and Negative. No suggestions are given for achieving balance of course, because each situation is different. I struggle with Balancing my studies. The best method I have of maintaining this balance is through relearning and refocusing.
Relearning helps me remember things longer. It took me about two years to remember the wheel of the year because the beginning of my Wicca studies saw me reading ten things at once. I had to go back, and go back, and go back again before all of it stuck in my head. The same is true now – when I am distracted from learning about Manannán mac Lir and forget everything I just read, I make a conscious effort to return to the reading later and relearn the material.
Refocusing works the same way. Sometimes I have to stop, think about what I’m doing, and refocus my studies. Wicca is wrong? Instead of studying more in-depth about it, I told myself to refocus and find another path. Celtic Reconstruction still not right? Pull another book from the library shelf and choose a new idea to investigate.
And in this way, I can Relax and find my Balance. It’s hard to remember sometimes, that this is not a race to learn everything. It is a slow, meandering journey that may require doubling back or training my eyes on something off the path.